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Prism
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Postby Prism » Sun Apr 22, 2012 9:37 pm

The reason I asked for fixing is coz I know something like this might happen thus I asked... So let´s break it down.

The problem with the hallucinogen part is mostly due to the fact that Pilgrim wrote it himself wihout much of my input to it ... or better put, the last things I suggested to him were pretty much ignored for some reason thus I wanted to somehow make it into a contrast with what he wrote and what I tried to get him to write when we were talking about that topic. That´s why it seems one way in his post and another in mine. If it were as I "suggested" there would be no such fight, no such taunting, no lack of spirit or w/e etc. Alas it is not so...

As for the effort part. Yes, I lack that nowadyas and I too am not very keen on recaps but once someone is "used" you might as well give their point of view. As for the new events that are happening that you mentioned... since this is not a part of "my story" a.k.a the main story, I can not really put much new stuff in it in order not to mess up the pace for those who "star" in the current events (namely Seven and Iris). Another problem with this is that I had to be skipped. Since I was, some context I could have had written earlier was skipped thus the catching up now seems as jagged as it does. I´m not making excuses, just stating facts.

Moving on ... point taken.

Lastly... I see where you´re comming from but once again ... this part was a bit of a misscommunication so the whole thing turned into a mess.

Conclusion: Probably will redo the post, or at least some parts of it....
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Postby KazeTanade » Sun Apr 22, 2012 10:49 pm

1. Well honestly, Prism, if there was such a massive difference in your ideas and his, I think it's just better not to contrast it. PM Pilgrim about it, discuss it with him, and we can have it fixed up the next time. Most contrasts in literature are used to communicate a friction of personalities, principles, or beliefs between characters, rather than between the authors.

2. I find that if there is a lot of things missing that I want to discuss from the previous posts, but in the current post its hard to mention them without interrupting the flow of things, a flash-back is a good way to convey it without disrupting the immediacy of the present. But in most cases, it's just better to adapt and change. That's also one of the things that makes RP fun; adapting and changing original story routes based on what happens in the now.

To make that point more clear... I suppose there was a lot of things I wanted to do with Lyon, which I had problems doing because I had to skip a few turns. I wanted to elaborate more on Kar'gath's personality, and the man's ambition to become some kind of king pin of Argei'non. However, I did not really find the right opportunity to do so, so I just kind of changed plans a bit, changed how things end up, and achieve the goals some other way. Rather than catch up, just get back into it where it is now; its so much cleaner, smoother, and easier, with a lot less headaches to write for that way.

What I really think you should do is to delete this post, and just write the new bits with more energy, in a way that makes you feel good about it. Ignore the old bits, and the recaps; they arent really needed, as both writers did a fantastic job of portraying those points of view without actually delving into the character's minds, even if it didnt come out exactly as you planned. If its a huge problem that should not have been like that, you can and should PM the writer about the discrepancy, and have them edit it, or something to that effect. It really helps to keep things clean this way.

Remember, the most important bit about RPing is enjoying your writing. There's no point writing it if you dont derive any enjoyment from it.
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Postby Pilgrim » Fri Apr 27, 2012 7:52 pm

Heya, just letting everyone know that I've done changes to my post. Notably the part when Joseph snaps out of his hallucinogen. Minor changes, but important changes all the same.

That's all. Pilgrim out.
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Postby Prism » Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:50 pm

Much appreciated for the cooperation there Pilgrim. My "new" post shall hopefully be up by the end of the weekend or Monday tops. Hopefully this time it will be ... good xD
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Postby Prism » Mon Apr 30, 2012 5:27 pm

Oky as promised, my rewamped post is done. Kept some parts of the previous ne and redid the rest completly. Hopefully this time, it will pass xD
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Postby Pilgrim » Wed May 09, 2012 7:37 pm

Exam's in about a month's time, and no, I'm not going to disappear under the radar for that long, but things regarding my post have been slowing down a bit. As an apology gift, please accept one of my thousand rejected drafts to pass the time and feed the illusion that I've been writing industriously.

[spoiler]"Look what Joseph got me for my birthday!"

The headmistress snapped awake mid-snore on the table, which was filled with number three bean cans and hastily-scrawled forms, a tax bill still stuck on her forehead. She plucked it away haughtily, grumbling in sultry consternation, too tired to even get up and collect the colorful pills that had rolled and rattled onto the floor. The yellow-spotted mirror in the corner could still give her an image of herself in some parts: purple eye-bags, with shaky hands, and a plump figure. There was also the reflection of a diminutive redhead girl, carrying a flock of balloons in each hand.

"Look! Lookie lookie! Balloons!" she squealed excitedly, "Joseph says they're enchanted!"

"Oh, that's very kind of him," she said, giving a sweet smile that showed little signs of exhaustion, "It's also very typical of him to forget that your birthday isn't till two months."

"I don't mind! He does it all the time!" Ginger beckoned the headmistress to come closer, and then whispered into her ear, "Sometimes I get two presents in the same year." She balled her hands up in a silent 'hooray'!.

She skipped out of the office with a click of her heels, "I'm going to fill the whole house with balloons. Then we can fly! And go adventuring! You!" she snapped to her minions, "Borris and Jenna! My will needs to be done! Obey my commands, slaves! We'll put some in the chimney now."

Jenna was ratty and shifty-eyed. She was nearly a whole foot taller than most of the boys her age, her face was caked with unwashed dirt. She was lounging on the couch in the shared hall, feet dangling in the air, blowing bubble gum.

"I ain't tyin' no bloomies."

"You will cos I tell you to. Slave!"

"No, no blooms! They hafta be magic, and all that. Them's danger! Gotta be rules 'gainst that."

"Fine! I'll let some go." Ginger walked up to the balcony, holding a couple of balloons in each hand. She pointed them to the sky dearly, trying to put on as brave an expression as she can. "I hold your blood oaths fulfilled," she said, to the balloons, maybe, as there was no one else around, and released them, "Go now. Be at peace."

"Hooray! To the mesosphere!" squeaked one balloon.

"FInally we get to go see the big ferris wheel in the sky!" squeaked another.

They travelled straight into a windmill, and popped with a loud blood-curling scream of sheer agony.

Ginger cupped her face and screamed, "WHAT HAVE I DONE? OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

She sprung awake. Quickly, she grasped for her security blanket, curling up into a fetal position and covering her whole body. She smoothened out the edges and made sure there were no gaps just in case a monster could creep in. She must have been staying in that position for what must have been the whole night, her breath heavy and unsteady, eyes saucer-wide in fear. Her eyes flitted over to the empty beds around her, tiny red bangs peeking out over the top of the blanket. The ones where Marcus and Jocelyn normally slept in, but were now empty. She wasn't used to sleeping alone.

She cuddled herself close, a child in bad need of a hug, and resorted to her yellow, silverfish-ridden pillow instead. She wished Joseph was here. Him and his silly ways, always thinking of new spells to cheer her up. He even tried to put magic dream-catchers under the bed to catch her night-mares! She always wondered why they were called night-mares. Maybe it was because when you caught one, they kinda look like horses.

She heard something rustling above her blanket, and she gasped. She slipped deeper underneath her blanket, squealing: "Go away, bad dream. Boo!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA--!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Ginger echoed the scream. She toppled over the side of the bed, taking the intruder who had been straddling atop her along for the fall.

"That's a level 42 Cunning Argument arcane spell, for the rapid conversion of heathens! A secret, ancient incantation passed down from among the chief priests of the dragon temples! You even remembered the Boo!" the young, curly-haired woman cried out. She got down on her knees, clasping her hands together, "Please, please don't hurt me, my lord. I am a worm, worthy only of slithering in your presence. A worm."

She laid down on the floor, moving around. "Silther slither."

The woman had short, blonde cropped hair that hugged the lingering baby fat of her face. A silky-white dress shimmered in the darkness.

"Who are you?" Ginger asked timidly, "You don't look like a horse."

"Does my figure displease you, my lord? A thousand apologies for the ugliness of my form!"

"Why are you acting so funny? You're a funny nightmare." A thought entered her head. "Am I still dreaming? Is this a dream within a dream and I'm actually lucid and I get to control what happens?" She squealed, "This is the part where my handsome prince sweeps me off my feet and brings me to his faraway kingdom just beyond the seas and then we get married and I have his children! One of them is called Micah and he looks just like his dad--"

"Yeah, I was there," the woman muttered, clutching her temples against the bombardment of information, "Nose and everything."

"Here it comes!" She waited expectantly. Nothing happened. "Aw."

She turned round to see the woman trying to stealthily tiptoe out, followed by tripping over her stash of toys and crumbling into a fit of curses and entangled fabric. "Where are you going?"

"Nowhere! Nowhere at all! And I am most certainly not stalking Joseph!"

"You were following Joseph?" Then, "You know Joseph? Are you his guardian angel?"

She flinched visibly, "No . . . no . . ."

"Do you have a name?"

"Lower-tier demons don't have names. You need to be at least head of your hierarchy before you are allowed any form of distinguishing identity --"

"I'm going to call you Schmooples."

". . . okay."

"So if you're his guardian angel, then how come you're not with him now, guarding him?"

The pretty guardian angel without wings or a halo on her head opened her mouth to say something, but then thought better of it. Instead she slumped onto the floor, muttering under her breath with a hint of unprofessional concern, "Joseph hasn't been sleeping much over the past few weeks."

Ginger tilted her head. "How come?"

"Lady Gwendolyn is about to wed Count Valerino in the eglise of St Moreaux this Duodi and become his wife to usher in a new age of prosperity."

'What?!"

"And now Joseph's lost all hope and turned himself in, and has been held prisoner atop that tower for a fortnight now, and is about to hang on the eve of the next morn for his crimes committed against the people and the crown."

"What?!"

"Also, your prince in your far-away kingdom has been cheating on you with the daughter of one of the councilmen for about a month now."

"I knew it!" she cried out, completely distraught on all ends, "This is a terrible night-mare! I want to wake up now!"

"This isn't a story, my lord. This is life."

"Fine, then. You will obey my command, slave. Or I will use my level one hundred cunning argument spell for the rapid making of who-cha-whacha-ma-call-it. Schmooples, you will take me to see Joseph."[/spoiler]
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Postby Pilgrim » Wed May 16, 2012 4:06 pm

Is that . . it cannot be! An update!
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Postby KazeTanade » Wed May 16, 2012 6:37 pm

you are a monster. That's all I'm going to say.
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Postby Prism » Mon Jun 04, 2012 10:07 pm

Yaaay, all done with school :D (about freaking time)

Read Pilgrims post and ... all nice, standar Pilgrim quality, but freaking Gallileo ? Come on man, seriously?! I know you have a huge imagination and much to write about and all, but at least stick to the settings. I may have never mentioned the worlds name but even calling it Earth is a bit ...yeah. That part just seem so out of place to me...
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Postby KazeTanade » Mon Jun 04, 2012 11:15 pm

Pilgrim is currently busy with not failing his medic degree, and therefore has no time to answer. Please leave your message after the *extremelyloudexplosionofsoundthatsoundsverymuchlikesevendyingagain*.
Last edited by KazeTanade on Wed Jun 06, 2012 9:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby Dominique » Wed Jun 06, 2012 9:24 am

Kaze is like, Pilgrim's answering machine. Please leave a message after the beep!

...Yes, I'm almost done with my post.
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Postby KazeTanade » Wed Jun 06, 2012 9:00 pm

There, fixed it.
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Postby Dominique » Fri Jun 08, 2012 7:31 am

My post is proofread, spellchecked, colour coded and edited. Now I'm just waiting to catch Kaze online so I can make him check on the whole part involving Lyon! In the meantime, if you would all be so kind to look at this picture:

[spoiler]
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[/spoiler]

It's hidden somewhere on the first pages of this OOC and it depicts the palace of Arg'einon. While discussing the whole execution rescue plan Kaze and I realised our plans clashed a bit with the general layout of the castle so we changed a whole bunch of things. Anyway, look at it so my post makes more sense. I'm sure you already remember this, Prism, but I figured it wouldn't hurt to post the image again :D
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Postby KazeTanade » Fri Jun 08, 2012 10:50 am

I'm sure my computer was online until your midnight, last night. I might not have heard anything, considering that I had guests over til the early morning, but I sure didnt see it when I got back loll.


if I'm not online when you are, email it to me and I'll check it over ASAP, thanks.
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Postby Pilgrim » Fri Jun 08, 2012 1:32 pm

IT'S OVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!

The exam was great! It was fun playing heads-or-tails and Eenie meeni mini mo! I'll see you guys back in the UK during summer for repeats! Woooooooooooo--

Found the castle pic, it was in Prism's post on the third page. Go supersleuth me.

As we all know, said prison guard known as Galileo is an insane nut-crack who talks to his books and dreams about strange imaginary kingdoms called 'Earth' (How craazzzzeeee) Believe him according to your own discretion.

NB: I have not picked up a HIstory book since after the Cempaka bonfire purge of 2009.
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Postby KazeTanade » Fri Jun 08, 2012 11:30 pm

I fail to see the relevance of your Nota Bena. We are not discussing history at all, just your use of names and terminology.
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Postby Dominique » Sat Jun 09, 2012 7:59 am

*nota bene


...what?
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Postby Pilgrim » Sat Jun 09, 2012 11:55 am

Because of my ignorance in history, the Victorian era, middle ages, Qing dynasty, Renaissance, Gengis Khan, Napoleon and the Wild West all occupy this strange soupy quantum shell where everything jumps places in the timeline every once in a while. But then I realized: hang on, it's not that Galileo is in the wrong era of current inspiration, it's the fact that I took him straight out of non-fiction in a different world with an effect akin to substituting him with Thor and calling the place Asgard. Which I totally would do if I could and get away with it. But okay, yeah, I'll change it.

Hey guys I'm off to see La Misera today!!!!!!!!! I'll be in London to jam with my friend in LSE, so I might be out of contact for about a day or so. Later, or as the Londonians would say, "Sod off, guv'nor!"*

*You can tell I've been doing research.
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Postby Dominique » Sat Jun 09, 2012 1:03 pm

I'd like to say i. fully support the adding of any character that resembles chris hemsworth.
also

*les mis/ les miserables
work on your foreign grammar, you too! ;)
have fun though, i love the music of that play!
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Postby KazeTanade » Sat Jun 09, 2012 1:32 pm

I DID pronounce the "ble" at the back when I told him about it. Apparently it did not sink in. XD

For the record, the picture of Lyon at the start of this thread IS from Les Miserable. Brownie points if you can guess who.
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Postby Dominique » Sat Jun 09, 2012 2:42 pm

Can i guess? :D im pretty sure i sent you thatt picture!
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Postby Pilgrim » Sun Jun 10, 2012 5:43 pm

People kept getting upset everytime I pronounced it the way it should be pronounced: Les Miserables, as in (bless) or (-bels like stables) so now I call it La Misera and everyone gets less upset. It's just better that way.

I dont know who Chris Hemsworth is, but is he the main character John van Jon? But I absolutely loved the Master of the House and friendzoned girl Aberdeen. And I'd bet Lyon is actually a singing Inspector.

Well worth the money
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Postby Dominique » Sun Jun 10, 2012 5:48 pm

John van Jon = Jean Valjean? Cos if so then you just made my day :D
Chris Hemsworth plays Thor in the Avengers <3 He's so pwetty!

And if you pronounce Les Miserables like that, no wonder you get people upset :P Haha, how was it though? I mean, other than worth the money. Don't you just love the songs! I seriously got shivers when I heard Castle on a Cloud. The English accent really makes it sound so haunting!
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Postby Pilgrim » Sun Jun 10, 2012 5:58 pm

Hey, I just pronounce them the way I hear em. Aberdeen, Corsette, John van Jon, Elrongas and some other dudes. Not like they'll ever find out.

Castle on a Cloud was so cute. I had no idea they had a child actress in there, and the lyrics were so cool. "Being sad is not allowed/ in my castle on a cloud". BUt honestly, from opening to finish, there was not a time I felt bored, which, for a mind which has been conditioned to only accept plots with explosions every other minute, there may still be a chance for me.

Everytime the Inspector showed up and did his sombre 'I AM THE LAW AND THE LAW WILL NOT BE MOCKED', I wanted to do a standing ovation then and there. I Dreamed a Dream, anyone? Master of the House? One Day More? And the Bishop: you forgot these silver also, would you leave the rest behind?

The ending was the absolute crowd-winner.
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Postby Dominique » Sun Jun 10, 2012 6:21 pm

Oh, Oh, ask Kaze which part he played in Les Miserables!
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